Mom, I wish you could see this:

76039 COMS 215 M01 ARGUMENT ANALY & ADVOCACY 4.0 A 16.0000

58902 COMS 304 OO1 INTERVIEWING 4.0 A 16.0000

58904 COMS 421 OO1 INSTRUCT TRNG & DVLP COMM 4.0 A 16.0000

76045 CTCH 125 M02 INTRODUCTION TO COMPUTERS 4.0 A 16.0000

Hours Hours Grade
Attempted Earned Points GPA
Term Undergraduate..........: 16.0 16.0 64.0000 4.000
Accumulative Undergraduate..: 32.0 176.0 122.6800 3.833

Congratulations! You have made the Dean's list for this quarter.

I still miss you.

Happy Thanksgiving 2007

Yeah, I know, I'm a little early. I had to celebrate with the boys tonight because they will be with their Dad from Wednesday evening to Sunday evening.
I wasn't really planning on cooking a "Thanksgiving" meal, because I knew they were going to have a big deal with their Dad and Grandparents on Thursday. Last night ds #1 says "When are we having Thanksgiving with you, Mom?" I guess I needed to cook some turkey after all.

So, today, after working till 2 and taking a final from 3-5, ds #2 and I flew through the grocery store and this is what we came up with:



We had turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, homemade stuffing, crescent rolls and those sweet potatoes that Syd couldn't even get the animals to eat at her house, lol. DS #1 loves-em and he even makes them, so they are on the menu at our house. Yep- it was a regular carb-fest, I sat down at the table before I realized I had forgotten the green beans.
Here are two of my favorite people in the whole world, and two that make me very thankful:



We topped it off (the boys did, I was waaay too full) with oreo cream pie and apple pie with cool whip. They loved our "Thanksgiving Feast". Thankfully for me they aren't too particular, although I have to say that shopping to eating start to finish in 2 1/2 hours isnt too bad!

I thought I was smart-

Then I checked S's blog....

I have said all along she's my better half. I'm not smarter, but I'm smart enough to know she's the best thing that ever happend to me!

Big fish in little ponds

I attend a branch campus of a major state university. Well, not even a branch actually, more like a twig! Two buildings in a suburban office complex and shared faculty with a larger branch campus about thirty miles away. Anyway, the administrator in charge of this campus is very aware of her authority, and wants everyone else to be too. She taught a course this quarter in the classroom next to my Monday night class. Anytime we made any noise, if we laughed or anything, she'd come over and stand in the doorway and scowl.
I was on campus yesterday taking a final and when I was done I was sitting in the office talking to a classmate who works there. This administrator comes in and says "This doesn't sound like a work related conversation" I felt like saying, yeah that's cause it's NOT. I don't work there, thank God, because I can see how that woman could suck out your will to live really quick. Heaven forbid you might actually ENJOY coming to work. I've only been there two nights a week for two quarters and even I have figured out that this woman is a total Be-yotch. I feel for the people that actually have to work with her.

Live it up!

Here's how I've spent my million so far:

My Sweetheart came to see me....

We had the best weekend! So good in fact, that when it was time to go home yesterday, S decided to stay another night!

She got here Saturday morning. The kids and I drove about an hour to pick her up at the airport. DD #1 was her usual cheery self. The boys were fine. We stopped and ate breakfast on the way home and then just ran the big kids around to their weekend activities. DD #1 managed to stay gone most of the weekend, as has been her habit lately when she is supposed to be with me.

Sunday afternoon, DD#1 made herself scarce. S & I took the boys to see the Lady Buckeyes basketball game. My boss gave me two tickets, so we just had to pay for the boys. We had great seats and the boys got to shoot a couple layups on the court after the game. They thought that was great.

Monday evening we went to my daughters marching band concert. We sat on the bleachers right in front of where she stood in formation and if looks could kill I'd definately be dead right now. She is so hateful and cold to me. I know it's coming but it still hurts.

This was such a wonderful trip. We had a great time together and we got to have the kids around, which is something we haven't been able to do in a long, long time. The boys seemed to like having S around and had fun with her. P even wrote about S in his "weekend update" at school. He wrote "my friend from GA came to visit for the weekend". God, I love that boy.

C-R-A-Z-Y week

It sure has been hectic around here.

In my Monday night class my group gave our 90 minute presentation. We used a "Fear Factor" theme and had a couple fun games, a couple of fun clips to demonstrate
"Communication Apprehension", which was our topic. We just tried to have fun with it. I didn't feel as prepared as I wanted to be for the PowerPoint presentation, but we all got through it and the other students seemed to have fun with it for the most part.

Tuesday, I spent the evening preparing for my Wednesday project, which was a debate on whether or not Casino gambling should be legal in Ohio. I had the negative side, so I had to argue against it. I hadn't had a whole lot of time to get ready so I stayed up until about 1AM.

Just as I was ready to go to bed, I realized that I LEFT MY JUMP DRIVE in the computer in my classroom at school on Monday night. YIKES- it only has all my pictures, all my coursework for the past two years, and all my divorce stuff on it. I was stressed out about it, but figured someone probably turned it in to the office. I waited until about 7AM and called a classmate who also works at the center. After several phone calls and emails and lots of freaking out, she found it on the podium in the classroom. What a relief! Not only did it have all my personal stuff on there, it also had an assignment for my Monday night class that I was going to have to do completely over if that thing didn't turn up. Thankfully it did!

On the way to the debate class this afternoon my friend Meekster called. She sounded like death on a cracker. She was SOOOO sick! She wanted to let me know becuase her son babysits P after school. She said he could still come, but I didn't want P to get sick and I figured she didn't need two 8 year olds running around when she didn't feel good. I called my good friend D and she saved the day, drove to P's school and signed him out. Both her sons and mine are close in age so D went and got N (ds#1) and took him back to her house, too.

Being so preoccupied with finding my jump drive didn't give me a lot of time this morning to prepare myself for the debate this afternoon I did manage to go over my notes and pull off a reasonable showing. I feel like it went well, but I always think of better things to say AFTER I'm done. I hate that.

I left that class on one campus and drove to my next class at the small "center" campus close to my house. My friend handed over my Jump drive and I was so happy to have it back in my hot little hands! Class was short (the Professor was not feeling well) and I was able to print off my assignment from the jump drive and get that turned in.

I was home by 9:30, pretty good for a school night. The boys were tired from playing with their friends, so they went to bed and settled down pretty quickly. I got to read a few blogs and post this GIANT post! S is working on some of her schoolwork, so I'll probably do the same before turning in. It's the end of the quarter, but with my training presentation and my debate finished, I feel like a lot of the hard part is over. I still have 1 project to turn in and then finals. I will be so glad to have a break when this quarter is done!

Motrin is not dope

Talking to S on her way to work this morning:

S: my back hurts

J: Did you take any motrin?

S: I can't take that stuff everyday. Why do you want to keep me doped up all the time?

S will never be an addict, lol, as long as she is worried about the addictive effects of ibuprofen!

"Passing" for straight

I feel like such an idiot.

I was at school working on a group project with my classmates. Our project is about communication apprehension. We were discussing questions to ask in the initial part of our presentation to make people feel apprehensive and understand what that's like.
One of the kids in the group said why don't we ask "Do you think homosexuality is wrong?" That was followed by a discussion of who in the class might be gay. I was extremely uncomfortable, as I am not out at school (other than to 1, maybe two professors). I felt awful for not speaking up. I am at a small branch campus, these are all students in my major whom I will have to work with and be in class with for the next year. From their conversations, I have determined that at least two of the three are from a fundamentalist background. Even if the college experience has opened their minds somewhat, I don't know how they would've reacted to me disclosing my sexuality to them.

One part of me says, it's none of their business, and I shouldn't feel bad for keeping my business private. The other part feels like I'm denying myself and hurting others for not showing my classmates that gay people are around them all the time and they don't even know it.


One of my professors, Dr. K, refers to our part of the country as "The Mississippi of the north" for it lack of tolerance and the pervasive influcence of the fundamentalist churches. I can't say she is wrong in her assessment. Having been a fundie myself, I know their ways. They do exert a powerful influence in the everyday culture here.

I just want to go to school and be able to be myself. I guess I still have more to learn about my own communication apprehension.

I think I brought up my average

P & I carved our first pumpkin. It was so much fun! I'm sure his teacher had fun helping a whole class of third graders clean out pumpkins. He brought it home and he got so excited when I suggested we carve it. He thinks I'm a rock star now!

Justice for PH*ELPs

Infamous purveyor of hate gets his due:

Let's hope that jury award puts a crimp in their travel budget.

Snyder's attorney told jurors to pick an amount "that says don't do this in Maryland again. Do not bring your circus of hate to Maryland again," according to The Associated Press.

S thinks she got knocked up!

I wish. She said she felt sick this morning and I teased her that we should have been more careful on our trip. Smile. She can't have any more babies anyway, and I'm too old. It's a fun thought though.

In school "A", in Motherhood, "F"

Things have been so crazy around here. I have spent most of my evenings "on the road", taking the kids to their activities, going to work and school. Most evenings we get home in time to wash up and go to bed. I have managed somehow to keep up in all my coures. I have all A's going into the final weeks of fall quarter.

I wish I could say I was doing as well in Motherhood! Today I barely escaped the shame of all shames- sending my son to school without his pumpkin! His teacher sent a note home last week that he needed a pumpkin today. I remembered yesterday while I was in a meeting with my classmates about a project, then promptly forgot until it was time to take him to school this morning. Fortunately for me, there is a house around the corner with pumpkins for sale in the front yard. I felt like such an idiot knocking on a stranger's door at 8:40 this morning to buy a pumpkin, but hey, P had his pumpkin and he even made it to school on time- disaster averted. I am looking forward to having a break between quarters so the kids and I can just chill out at home and not be going some place every night.

I miss S

S sent me this today. She hurt her back Thursday during a tennis lesson. I wish I was there. I love her smile.

Southern Travelogue

Yes, I have returned, VERY reluctantly to the cold confines of the Midwest. I much prefer the warm sunny climate of Savannah and welcoming arms of S. It was one of our best trips ever, even though it started out on a rough note.

I was scheduled to depart at 1pm local time via Sky*bus, a new low cost air carrier. They don't fly directly to Savannah, but they fly to St Augustine, Florida a short drive to the south. No problem, we thought. I was scheduled to arrive in St Augustine before 3, then we'd be home in Savannah by 6. Things didn't go exactly as planned. My flight was delayed. We were boarded, deplaned and boarded again. We didn't depart until 5:45pm, so I didn't make it to Florida until 7pm. It was 10:30 before we got to Savannah.

S greeted me at the airport with these beautiful flowers.



I had had a very trying day and she had been waiting for me for hours so she decided to pick these up for me, along with some very nice earrings. She also got a haircut, and shopped for my boys and her girls. Flight delays can be very costly, lol!

We drove back to Savannah to a very sweet place we found on Craigslist. It was a very cozy ground floor apartment in the historic district. We liked that it had a separate living area where we could study and watch TV. It also had a kitchen so we could cook for ourselves (although due to the flight delay we didn't end up using it too much)

Saturday we did a quick trip to Macy's for a couple of things we needed and then we just stayed in the apartment for the most part, napping and relaxing. I did venture out for a walk in the historic district while S did some reading. We had a wonderful lunch at The New South Cafe. Seriously people, if you go to Savannah, you must go to this place. It is AWESOME. We had the best meal of the whole trip. I had the catfish and S had salmon. Both were delicious beyond words, and our check was less than $25.00.

Saturday night we walked from our little hideaway to a restaurant in the historic district that S wanted to try. Unfortunately, we lacked the necessary reservations, so we ended up eating at the Jazz'd Tapas Bar . The food was good, but we both agreed that The New South was better. S said the best part of her meal was the she-crab stew. It would have helped if they had a band, but we were probably there too early for that. They did have the Georgia/Vanderbilt game on the tv in the bar when we came in (If you can call that a game, lol)

After we left the restaurant, we were very full and tired from all the walking earlier in the day, so we tried one of these. The driver kept saying he was having trouble because he had a "bad cab", but we thought it was more the fact that he probably weighed 100 pounds soaking wet and between S and I he was trying to move about 300 lbs. lol. After he got us a few blocks closer to our destination we gave him a reprieve and a generous tip.

After that, we walked the rest of the way home and spent the rest of our trip just having quiet time together (OK,some of it was not so quiet ; ). It's hard to be in a long distance relationship, and one of the hardest parts is not having those "regular" things to do and be if you're always in a hotel room, sight-seeing and eating out like you're on a "trip". This time we tried really hard to just have some of those everyday times that couples who actually share the same zip code probably take for granted. I have to give credit where it's due. It was all S's idea and it was a great one.

Thursday Rant ( You've been warned)

Well, it's been quite a day.
I should be excited and happy about seeing S tomorrow.
Instead, I'm frustrated and upset.
My ex refuses to acknowledge that he is not in charge any more.
His attorney sent a letter to my attorney about a child's basketball league.
Hello? We are already divorced, remember? What are the attorneys going to do about it other than charge us $200 an hour to write letters back and forth?
I asked him if he had money just laying around to throw away on that bs and he just mumbled something about his parental "rights" and how I'm severing the kids ties with the community becuase I don't want them to play in a basketball league this winter.
I forgot to pick up DD #1 at band practice. Completely. forgot. I don't see her very much at all (her choice) and I have been running like crazy all week trying to get caught up on school work and take care of projects and midterms. She called me as I was on the way home from my test, after a friend's Mom brought her to my apartment. She was not very happy. I took dinner home, then had to run another errand before I had to take her back to her Dads. She was in trouble with him, and usually when she's in trouble, she'll start on the "Mom doesn't love me" kick to divert attention from her own misbehavior. So after she "vented" to Dad, she called me to tell me that I treated her like dirt under my feet. I spent the next half hour on the phone setting her straight. The fact is, I have been giving her what she says she wants. I have allowed her to have her way, I haven't compelled her to spend time with the boys and I. So before, when I was making her go with us, she was mistreated, and now that I don't make her she's mistreated. I can't win.

I paid off all the attorneys this week- finally. I had hoped that would be the end of it, but since the ex still feels the need to write to his attorney about every little thing, I guess I may have to keep mine around. I told my attorney and the GAL that my ex would not "settle down" after the divorce was over, he would only get worse w/o the court looking over his shoulder. He is such a jerk.

I'm leaving town tomorrow. S and I are taking a weekend trip. Any more days like today and I might not come back!

I got hurt playing Wii

That's what I get for laughing at Zoe. She was lamenting the fact that the last time she played Wii, she messed up her back. I managed to mess up my neck and I wasn't even playing! I got this game system for the boys for Christmas, but ended up caving and giving it to them last night. They were playing with it, I was standing in the kitchen facing the counter, talking on the phone. DS #2 comes up behind me puts a hand on each shoulder and jumps on my back saying "Thank you, thank you , thank you!" He is normally pretty rambunctious but this was a little much even for him. It made me drop the phone and everything. I wasn't thanking him this morning when the pain in my neck woke me up before the alarm clock did. I don't think the chiropractor's office is even open today. Muscle relaxers, anyone?

"... it is easier to overcome people's judgments than to overcome our own self-judgment, the fear we internalize." -- Arianna Huffington in Newsweek.

She said this in an article about women and power. She said something else that struck a chord with me as well. She said that it was so important to her that her Mom believed in her and made her think anything was possible. She made her believe that she could shoot for the stars and that if she failed, her Mom would still love her and accept her for who she is/was. This strong influence of her Mother and encouragement even when others discouraged or disbelieved helped Ms. Huffington get where she is today. I don't know that much about her, but I think these sentiments are profound. I know the first quote is so true in my life. S has helped me to see that in a lot of circumstances in the past, the biggest obstacle to my success was me. I'm trying really hard to change that mindset in my life and make sure that ds#1 & 2 never have that damn doubting voice in their heads.

I'm so ashamed....

I would never pass for a computer nerd or a sci-fi or comic book nerd.
Awkward has always been my strong suit.

Pink ribbons, etc.

A post over at Sassy's, the Sunday paper, and events of the day have all combined to bring you this post.

No one ever likes to lose a parent, no disease is a "good" disease, we hate them all, most especially the ones that take our loved ones from us.

I found out after my Mother died of lung cancer, that it is the # 1 cancer killer of women. It far outpaces, breast, ovarian, colorectal combined. We fund research for breast cancer at the rate of around $22,000.00 per cancer death. That number for lung cancer is only $1700.00. $1700.00!!! What is worse is that the differences in how this disease affects men vs women are not understood or really even being studied. So many women who are stricken with lung cancer, like Dana Reeve, NEVER smoked.

According to Sunday's Parade magazine the five year survival rate for breast cancer victims is 89%. The five year survival rate for women with lung cancer is 16% . By the time we knew Mom was sick, it had already invaded her brain. I'm so glad that breast cancer has gotten so much attention and funding that they've been able to make such great strides. I hope that lung cancer will get the same treatment soon.

If you still have your parents, be glad, call them and tell them you love them.